We’re Not Here for the Drama, Mama!
Written by: Nizana
Sometimes you hear dancers lamenting about the drama that can occur in the dance community in different social medias or talking amongst each other. Some "stuff" is absolutely mind boggling and some is more subtle. Dancers are human, so of course there is an element of that everywhere, but let’s not forget that part of what belly dance is about IS community and sister (and brother!) hood which means being supportive of one another versus, well, not so supportive. And how can we ensure we are acting in a spirit of community you ask?
Let’s look at our own behaviors first
- Do you live up to your commitments such as showing up for shows you are signed up to dance at, or are you ready to go in the lineup, or is everyone waiting for you as the producer is becoming a nervous wreck?
- Do you dance and run or do you stay to support the other dancers?
- As an audience member, are you only zaghareeting and clapping for your friends or are you showing some appreciation for some aspect of each dancer’s performance?
- Are you supporting as many events as you can instead of just the ones you can dance at?
- When you speak of other dancers publicly, are you finding ways of being supportive of their efforts or are you being gossipy or mean spirited?
- Do you give credit where credit is due such as to the choreographer of your dance routine, your troupe director, or your teachers?
Ponder the answers to these honestly and adjust accordingly. You should always be ready to go, so that others are not waiting on you. Communicate in advance if an emergency comes up and you need to cancel or will be late. Be supportive of all the dancers as an audience member, especially if they’ve done something really cool and by all means, genuinely and specifically compliment each other as often as possible. Try to attend more events than just the ones you can dance at and try not to have a pattern of dancing, packing up and leaving as soon as you‘re done. Being an audience member is part of the experience, and promoters and vendors appreciate the support. When you feel the need to critique someone such as to point out to a student what not to do, don’t do it publicly. Balance the critique. Always be truthful and don’t say things just to stir things up. Always credit the work of others you are presenting and don’t claim them for your own. Appreciate the time and resources you are given by others as a gift.
Instead of dividing the community and forging ahead without respect for others, some other ideas to reduce drama include collaborative efforts and inclusion. Another thought is it seems sometimes the old “better than thou” creeps in where everyone thinks they are better than anyone else and the best thing since sliced bread when it is better to appreciate the strengths and beauty of all dancers. Everyone is unique. You don’t always know what others are going through- could be illness, bad news, performance or first time jitters so making negative comments can be extra hurtful in these cases, causing unnecessary drama. Okay, yes, I don’t wear rose colored glasses; it could be they are also a bad dancer or a flake or a mean spirited person, but for your contribution to reduce drama, try to remain balanced and accepting of others.
I have recently begun to see other dancers address this in print and think it is timely. For example, from Tamalyn Dallal on a supportive event: “This made me realize the most important meaning of dance...Love, community and supporting your fellow man. It is human and transcends politics. We can learn the latest steps, buy costumes from Egypt, and strive to build our careers. It is all good. But in the end, what is most important was what I saw this weekend. Dance as community, support, and love.”
Add your own ideas to what I’ve mentioned here and let’s try to be respectful and supportive of one another, remember the old golden rule thing, and the spirit and connectedness of the dance, and reduce that drama, mama!
