Egypt and Beyond * Installment 5
The "Three Hour Camel Tour"
Zaina and Her New Buddy
When I started this series of articles, it took some time
for my rather odd sense of humor to kick in. But finally there it was, it the form of an old TV
“Diddy”. Now, to get
the full flavor of this tale, you must step back a few years. Many of you may not be old enough to
have heard the “tune” to Gilligan’s Island, but with the recent Youtube,
iTunes, etc. environments, and all the “retro” talk you may have heard it or
can find it quickly. Once the tune
is firm in hour head, read and hum along . . . .
Zaina and Oberon’s Three Hour Pyramid Camel Tour
Just sit right there and you'll read a tale
a tale of an incredible trip,
that started from an exotic hotel,
in the exciting land of Egypt.
The mate was a darling dancing girl,
the editor with Hart for sure,
two ladies set out that day,
for a three hour CAMEL tour,
a three hour CAMEL tour.
The locals started getting rough,
and tossed the mate on an ass.
If not for the courage of that fearless mate
the trip would have been a bore
the trip would have been a bore.
The camels set down in the shadow of
this spectacular desert land
with Oberon,
and Zaina too
a camel guide and his son,
a Tourist Police,
the donkey and silly man,
here on the Pyramid Camel Tour.
So, you are wondering where the opening poem comes from. Welllll... ... Oberon and I had scheduled a day
outside of the Festival. As I
stated earlier, we were so rushed around the Pyramids that we just had to have
another look. And as far as I was
concerned there was no better way to see it than by camel. Now, I say again, Oberon is NOT a fan
of the camel (giggle). But she
agreed to go because it was something I really REALLY wanted to do. No cart and horse, just give me the
camel. So, after we mentioned our
desire to our wonderful “Knight” Memo, he made arrangements for our tour and
even picked us up at the hotel to deliver us to our guide and camels. Note 2: This was a day that I chose to break
from the rules to wear the ‘one’ pair of long pants I had brought and figured I
would either be stoned to death (not likely) or come out on the other side more
comfortable and happier (in fact the case).
Zaina - So very Comfy on Her Camel
We went early to avoid the harsher heat of the day –
something I highly recommend if you should desire to visit the colossus’ this
way. The sway of a camel reminds
me of what I call soft piston hips; my particular style of dance is down
driven, right side, left side rolling along - - just natural movement to
me. Same with a camel, both legs
on right step together, then both on left - - it is to me as soothing a stride
as can be and I feel quite at home sitting high in the saddle.
Oberon Headed into Cairo Traffic - On Her Camel
And not in the least bit scared
(So why won't she turn around and smile for the camera?)
So, there we were, headed out of the village, on our way to
the pyramids which were actually just a few blocks away. Oberon seeming to calm down after just
a block, well, calm right up to the main road which was full of morning rushed
traffic. As she began questioning
our guide (who was on a horse), “we’re not really going out into the traffic
we?” And “But, but we’re going the
wrong way”. With the driver on his
horse in front, Obei next and me behind, there we were, camels moving AGAINST
traffic (heh, at least we would be able to see what was going to hit us), up
the road, past the round-a-bout, and up the hill. Memo was waiting for us outside his store, waiving and
laughing knowing Obei’s discomfort and my complete “glee” at sitting that
camel. I couldn’t stop laughing,
not at Obei’s fear, but I just felt giddy. I kept thinking, I am in Giza, on a camel, riding it up the
hill to see one of the greatest wonders in the world. How could I not be ABSOLUTELY GIDDY about it?
Once inside the grounds, we were off the camels to purchase
our tickets into the park, then back on the camels and on to the grand
tour. We first came around the
side of the Khufu pyramid, our guide offering tidbits of information along the
way. We noted the Tourist Police
on camels far off in the distance and the immense size of the park. Wonderous.
Side Step to “The Great Donkey Incident”
Now I have to tell you, reading this is just not the same as
me doing the “Obei” voice. But I will
try to do the best I can to make you feel as though you are there. Also with the disclaimer that I am not
making fun of my dearest friend, but the situation was so totally outrageous it
just makes me howl with laughter as well as those around me when I do tell the
story. And when I tell it with
Obei present, she gets the Obei look (one of complete surprise) as she says
“whaaat? Why are you laughing?”
So, as we rounded to the back of Khufu, and were making our
way up to the smaller Menkauree pyramid, I mentioned to our guide that I wanted
to get off the camels and take pictures there – Oberon in agreement. (As a side: I had seen a picture of Oprah on the cover of one of her
magazines, where she was sitting on a rock, back to the camera and looking over
her shoulder. I loved that photo,
the way it made her look so curvy and wanted to find a place we could get the
same type of flattering shot. I am
not a poser. However, pick up a
camera and Oberon has already struck the mark, ready for her close-up. Me, I think too much about it and it
never seems natural.) But I
digress. As the guide was settling the camels and we were stepping away, a man
with a donkey approached. He was
chattering rapidly about getting a picture taken with the donkey. I was not interested, remember – I LIKE
CAMELS and the donkey didn’t look any bigger than most dogs. I simply said “La” and proceeded to
walk towards the rock wall where I wanted to take pictures.
Oberon - In Succession from
"No, I don't want . . oomph"
to "Posing for her Pictures, with our Guide even"Oberon, being kind and gracious as
always, began to explain, “nooo, I don’t want a picture with the donkey”. But, the merchant seeing a
gracious woman, and not caring one itsy bit what she was saying, and bound and
determined to acquire his baksheesh, continued to persuade in his special
way. I was still moving towards
the rock wall, and heard again, “nooooo, noo, really we are too big for the
donkey, I don’t want to get on the donkey, thank you for asking, but
nooo”. I turned for a quick
glimpse, the guide was still close by her, and I saw somehow she had a new head
wrap on and was holding a stick – whatha?
As I stepped up onto the wall, camera in hand and of course at the
ready, I heard, “nnnoooo, I don’t wannnntt tooo - ommph”. I had turned just in time to see the
donkey master, both hands full of Obei booty tossing her on the donkey no
matter the protesting. All I could
do was laugh and most hysterically too.
When is the last time you tried to take a picture while crying? Huh? Yeah! And bless
her heart, Oberon still hit her mark, posing, smiling beautifully for the
camera all the while continuing to give reprimand for ANYONE even a child being
on the donkey.
But Alas, Back to the Three Hour Camel Tour and
The Oprah "Pose"
Once my laughter subsided and Oberon had somewhat gotten
beyond her experience with the donkey dude, we were ready for the photos. And as anticipated, the outcropping of
rock proved to be the very “feast of photo opportunities” I thought it would
be. We did the Oprah pose, the
leaning pose, and even the “world traveler pose” before the, well, the slight
international incident. I say
slight because it never hit the news.
It could have if not for quick thinking and fast feet. This comes with a warning. Note 10: DO NOT LEAVE YOUR GUIDE "ever". Or better yet, DO NOT LET YOUR GUIDE LEAVE YOU.
Zaina and Oberon offering their very best Oprah Poses
We took those first few pictures just
up inside the rocked area still laughing and giggling about the donkey and
still giddy we were even there. We
then began our walk towards the smaller pyramid of Menkaure (who was the last
great pyramid builder on the plateau), continuing to take photos. As we came out of the long rocked
walkway and up to the side of the Menkaure pyramid, we found a Tourist Police
had been snoozing in a lawn chair.
Since we startled him, he jumped up, which startled us. From the onset of our arrival “back
there”, my eyes seemed constantly trained on his gun which was leaning up
against the rocks across from where we stepped into that small area. I
therefore was a little less frightened when he actually stepped in front of us
and not allowing us to go any further because unlike most of the TP he did not
have his gun in his hand. He began
demanding we hand over our cameras so he could take pictures of us holding up
our hands, placed strategically to look as though our palm was directly on top
of the pyramid. When we tried
telling him no, la’, it made little difference – he continued to grab and
reach. He then demanded twenty
American dollars and I do mean demand.
Oberon was shocked (perhaps still suffering the effects of the great
donkey incident) and I was beginning to get angry (not a good sign) that he
wouldn’t just leave us alone.
Well, how stupid was I? Two
women alone, no guide, no protection, behind a bunch of rocks and a man with a
gun – in any City in the world - just not a good idea. All I could think to say to Obei was
“we need to run – NOW”. So, we
half ran out from the area with the guard hot on our heels, and straight to our
guide yelling for his assistance.
The Long Entry into Our
SHOULDN'T GO THERE ALONE ALLEY
BEAUTIFUL!
We managed our way down the corridor of rocks, and our guide
did intervene long enough for us to high tail it up onto our camels. He spoke sharply with the TP and we
went on to finish our little excursion behind Cheops heading over to the Sphinx
while getting a lecture from the guide about how little the guard makes monthly
with our guide receiving just as stern of a lecture from us on not leaving us
alone again. As our hearts stopped
thundering and we began to calm down, we were treated to a view of the remnants
of the villages and cemeteries that have been unearthed – ancient villages
where the workers who may have built the pyramids lived and passed on.
Moving around the pyramids and the Sphinx in this way is
quiet and somewhat ethereal in its feeling. The sun was beginning to sit high in the sky, the breeze was
slight but warm, with my leg thrown over my darling camel’s neck like a well
seasoned camel rider - - the experience is what dreams are made of and will
stay with me for the rest of my life.
Behind Cheops
Our guide took us back to Memo through the village that lies
between the pyramids and our hotel.
We were treated to a different view of the outskirts of Cairo. Brief conversations with locals and
merchants, as animals were herded through the streets and children played. I had been given a mental picture by
someone months earlier who explained the complete poverty in the village and
area leading into the pyramid plateau with a follow up that people lived just
outside in cardboard boxes, etc. I
must clearly disagree with that image and tell you that I saw not one person
living in a box, but rather a significant mixture of homes, from the very small
and poorest to the very large and more wealthy. What I saw was a community of people, working together, to
provide the tourists who visit with a grand experience. While our Tourist Police was
frightening, we really had the experience of a lifetime, up close, more
personal and are grateful for it.
Oberon riding through the Village
My lesson and opinion - don’t let anyone color your dream
with a black crayon before you ever step foot in this remarkable country. Be open to your experience and of
course as with anywhere you may travel, the United States included, do be aware
of your surroundings and take the necessary precautions so that you may have
the glorious experience the OZ team has had.
Installment 6 – The Fabulous Dervish Show,
at a caravanserai,
Wikala el-Ghouri in the Khan
